Day 4: T is for… Toshiba apples

19 Apr

[backdated entry]

Fate had it that I would see Mrs X (the one who was horrified at me taking her brain out) and her son back in clinic today. A delightful surprise.


Jo: How are you getting on?

Mrs X: My breathing is fine, but after 3 weeks in hospital I’m finding I can’t remember where I kept things, my security alarm code…

Mrs X’s son: Yes, it’s like someone removed everything from her brain.


I did not pay him to say that. Some things you just cannot make up.


* * *

T is for…

  • Thursday
  • Two days to go
  • Thank frick we’re nearly there
  • Time for a treat


As made famous in Marina Lewycka’s A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian. Toshiba being the make of microwave used in the creation of this dish.

Some of you will know I am a great proponent of microwave cuisine. My theoretical Desert Island Cooking Appliance would have to be the microwave, hands down, no contest. Clean, fuss-free, foolproof (not foilproof though, careful). Why generate so much extra washing up when you can cook in and eat out of just one receptacle?

Cases in point:

  • Scrambled egg – ‘normally’ requiring 1 bowl to whisk egg in, 1 frying pan, then 1 dish in which to serve it
  • Omelette – as before, except removal from appliance at the halfway point for quick fork-scrambling motion not required
  • Indomie with egg and veg – easily 3 separate cooking pots right there!
  • …that’s as far as my repertoire goes…

Essentially though, I strongly believe you can cook almost (keyword: almost) anything in a microwave. There are whole books dedicated to the subject (201 on Amazon!). True, the results aren’t always edible palatable. In which case just add Sriracha.



Sriracha I can’t wait for us to meet again. Two more days…

But I digress. Nikolai, the narrator’s dad, is a man after my own heart. He is an eccentric war refugee who invents and subsists almost solely on this dish following his wife’s death.

This is his special recipe – apples gathered from the garden, peeled, chopped, packed into a pyrex dish and cooked in the microwave (a Toshiba) until they are sticky and solid. 

This gets supplemented occasionally with boil-in-the-bag mystery meats served up by his gold-digging, green-underwear-wearing new wife.


Nikolai: “I cook for myself – look, Toshiba apples. Cooked by Toshiba microwave. Full of vitamins. You like to try?”

(Except this is a Samsung apple. Pirated version)

After I read this book in 2006, for 6 months I breakfasted solely on a yummier, more nutritionally balanced variation of this – the Microwave Apple Crisp. But I can’t afford oats at the minute, so this will have to do. In fact this does very nicely. Mmm.

Serves 1. Cost = 9p.


Toshiba Apple 


  • 1 apple – 0.08
  • 1 tsp brown sugar – 0.01
  • 1 pinch cinnamon – closer to 0.00 than 0.01…
  • 1 tbsp butter (optional, I didn’t use it) – technically 0.05, but for me, 0.00


  1. Core the apple.
  2. Place into bowl.
  3. Fill the inside with butter if desired.
  4. Sprinkle sugar and cinnamon over the top.
  5. Microwave uncovered on high for 3 minutes.
  6. Allow to cool for 5 minutes.
  7. Savour. Relish. Enjoy. And bask in the humble glory of the Toshiba Apple.


* * *

Full Day 4 Menu to follow on Friday. Sorry for the slowness. My mental faculties are not at my full disposal at the minute. I cannot help but be preoccupied with the fact that in 24 hours, my dietary horizons will expand beyond the confines of bacon, bacon and more bacon. 24 hours more!!

One Response to “Day 4: T is for… Toshiba apples”


  1. Day 4: More Jammin’ with Bacon | Jo Lives Below The Line - April 21, 2013

    […] Toshiba apple – 0.09 […]

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